Hi everyone,
Please find below a guest post from Juno who sadly passed away on 1st January 2015, but though she remains greatly missed her humorous take on life in Cardiff (and occasionally elsewhere) continues in her blog at http://cardiffcoolcat.com/ In the following post she reflects on her experience of visiting the vet.
They seem to think that I am not listening and taking in everything they say on the phone… not using the V-word eh? Seems like my resident nazi sympathiser has a trip planned for me; but little do they know I saw the postcard (addressed to me!) about my annual health check and booster vaccination being due. “It will be an adventure” they say, while slyly referring on the phone to some “trip to Hull and back” or a similar phrase. Well, I have my own plans regarding this forthcoming adventure I can tell you. Firstly, I try the hiding thing,
… but I guess the whiskers against the plain door kind of gives the game away. Never mind, there is always Plan B…
Looking busy, counting the number of sheets of photocopying paper in the box beneath the printer. Being helpful should do the trick… Damn, this wasn’t supposed to happen, where did this cage come from?
All that work in the office and I must have taken my eye off the ball, and the devious servant’s only gone and rubbed a couple of brain cells together and come up with their own plan. So, if this is going to be an adventure at least I can expect a luxury limo to match my regal status as I glide around town…
… Ok, so I own a parking space, but who nicked the motor?
It looks like it is going to be the bus again. All that rickety, bumpy stuff, with both ends of the human age range asking their inane questions like “what have you got in the basket? Can I see the cat?” I might be mild-mannered in appearance but why can’t the disobedient one just invite them to put their fingers in through the grill?
So here we are at last, in the devil’s waiting room. They try to fool you with nice young ladies smiling and calling me by name, when I know all too well that this is where I get groped and prodded, a sharp spike in the back of the neck, and the ultimate indignity of providing an indelicate home for someone’s thermometer! Why can’t they just ask me what my temperature is?
After an interminable few hours (ok, minutes… but quite a few of them), with me desperate to get back into that cage that I originally never wanted anything to do with, we are heading for the door. Escape at last… never did a bus look so good.
Thankfully, ‘to Hull and back’ is only an annual ordeal, but while I suffer the indignity of missing out on the chance to recline in a stretch limo, licking my bits and waving a paw to my subjects on the streets, I can at least move to Plan R… revenge on my resident trickster who tried to con me into thinking this was going to be an adventure. I could show them what post-adventure trauma looks like… perhaps coughing up fur balls on that light coloured carpet; or even feigning post veterinary dementia by thinking the litter tray was behind the TV in the corner of the room.
I guess hell is a place we all have to go to once in a while so that home can look a little brighter as the evenings draw in and the darkness of winter looms ever closer. The things a cat has to do around here to get a few morsels of the poached salmon!
I am Juno, I have experienced the road to hull, but I am back. If this is adventure I will stick with my complex lifestyle of sleeping, eating and, well you know the rest… I will speak with you again soon.
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Thanks,
Marc
Very nice 😀 I could almost imagine our own cats thinking in that manner 🙂 Thank you for this post.
Thank you for liking the post, and also for the lovely direct comments you sent to me.
No problem, from one cat lover to another 🙂
Thanks ^^
Pingback: Guest Star: Juno – Call this an adventure? | If I would have known…
Thanks for the reblog 🙂
Reblogged this on If I would have known… and commented:
Thank you, Marc, for providing me with an insightful narrative on what I always suspected my Jazzy was thinking!
Wow, thank you Rita for enjoying the post, but especially for re-blogging it. That means so much to me.
My three cats just read this and nodded in agreement. Juno had it all figured out!
The intelligence of cats never ceases to amaze!
Exactly!
Hehe 🙂
Juno, You were a VERY SPECIAL CAT! Please find Ms. Cali and be her friend. She is with you wherever you are today!! Just look for a lost looking Calico cat with a face that is half black and half white, and she is REGAL, just like you! This is a very SPECIAL AND LOVING POST I VERY MUCH ENJOYED READING!! Dedicated to Juno always and forever!
Thank you for sharing your enjoyment of the post, and I sincerely hope Ms Cali and Juno are sharing their reflections on having been loved.
Thank you <3
I must remember that concept of “post veterinary dementia!” I think it explains a lot. Juno was quite the grand lady, I am sure she gets to have a stretch limo in cat heaven.
Thank you ^^
Thank you for that lovely thought. She hated any journey in the car or bus, but probably because she always felt deserving of a grander vehicle!
Condolences to the owner/best friend.
SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME JUNO AND ALL OF OUR LOST CATS ARE IN HEAVEN? PLEASE, I CANNOT LIVE ANOTHER DAY WITHOUT MS. CALI……SOME WHO JUST KNOWS: TELL ME THAT OUR CATS HAVE SOULS AND THEY ARE SOMEWHERE TOGETHER AND HAPPY!! I AM LOSING ALL OF MY FAITH AND GOING INTO SEVERE PTSD, HAVING JUST BURIED MY MOTHER TOO. MOM AND MS.CALI WERE THE ONLY LIVING BEINGS WHO LOVE ME SO UNCONDITIONALLY. THE REST COULD NOT CARE LESS….
SO IF YOU DO KNOW AND YOU DO HAVE FAITH, PLEASE TELL ME YOU DO!
I don’t know for sure, but that is what I believe… And if it helps you, hold firm that belief too xxx
I second what Ritu said. <3
?
I take comfort from that thought, and keep writing Juno’s View to hold on to all the lovely moments she shared while here.
A beautiful idea ?
Thank you <3
Being only 1 Sonu Singh has only had 1 annual visit to the shhhhhhhh! Vets… But I can imagine his thinking was Juno-like, totally!!!!
Pity the Vets… the fabulousness of cats relegates this necessary profession to the level of politicians, journalists and estate agents!
Oh so true!!!?