Hello my friends, let me introduce myself. I’m Billy – a black cat living in Belgium. What is so special about me? Well, let me tell you.
I’m handsome looking boy with diabetes. My mom gives me an insulin shot twice a day so I don’t get too sweet on the ladies. I nap most of the time. I nom. I clean my fur. You know, the things every cat does.
Then there are the things you are not aware of. I’m a time traveler.
Ah, I bet you didn’t see that one coming. I have my own TARDIS, so I nap between time and space. What else do I do in the TARDIS, besides organizing parties with universal fame? I go on adventures saving the human race, cats, moms, noms, dads, the universe, planets and even dogs, can you imagine that….
There is always someone in trouble. The TARDIS, me and my loyal companions are always ready to do what has to be done.
Like the day I was flying around with my TARDIS, I found a kitty toy floating in space. Kids these days are so careless, so I started the search to find its owner. I flew further and I saw more and more toys floating around. I was worried. This didn’t feel right – my whiskers started to itch. This looked more and more like there was something disturbing going on. I had to save these toys and bring them back to their owners. I know I feel devastated when I lose a toy. How many cats would feel devastated about the loss of their favorite toy? How many mom-cats would get desperate because they could not calm down their kittens?
I had to investigate it further, correct what felt wrong. Who catnaps toys? To find out, I had to follow the trail of toys. I had to be careful not to reveal myself. After a few light-years, I saw a sign in space: “Welcome to the Land of the Fridge”. I had never heard of it, but I had to investigate. The trail was clear… all the toys went that way. I sneaked in and what I saw there…
Fridges playing with cat toys. Can you believe it?? All humans have such an evil thing in the house. The enemy is in our house. I had to warn my friends that the fridges are stealing our toys.
So I escaped this evil place and started to plan how to stop this disaster. Now that’s the difficult part of my life: “making plans”.
I decided to travel back in time to the time period just before the fridge showed up in households. I became a teacher. I taught my cat friends that they have to sit at the fridge and “miauw” whenever it is catnapping a toy, and to put their paws under the fridge. They learned it quickly, you have to see them sitting at the fridge and see them doing what I told them to do. Unfortunately humans misunderstand easily, yes, kittens you can’t blame them because they are sometimes so limited. Humans started to think that we wanted food from the fridge (the only good thing) but they are wrong. So humans-staff-personal, whatever your cat calls you. If your cat waits at the fridge, get on your knees. Yes, on your knees and look under the fridge – it is probably stealing toys! On the occasion that there is no toy under it, your cat wants noms. For your information, the trail of toys going to the “Land of the Fridge” is dropping to a small limit.
You see the life of a time cat is really important, just don’t ignore the signals of your cats, interpret them correctly and “live long and prosper”
Billy, The Time Cat